How could I still have tears over this?

Last Monday at 4pm I received a call from Bradens Grandfather. I have never talked to him before apparently he got my # from Josh (Christina's ex-boyfriend). He informed me that Braden and his older brother are in foster care. Christina lost them in November. He is trying and now has gotten the right to care for the older brother but wants us to take Braden because he feels like we should be his family. He told me the social worker would be in touch in the next few days. I never heard from her. I called him back and we talked more. To make a long story short I just kept calling her until I got her. The Grandfather made it sound like she wanted to work with us. When I talked to her she told me we needed a lawyer. Um... well, we are out if this is gonna be a battle. We do not have the $$ to fight this. I then told her we are home study ready and we have our only have a few hours left to get our foster care licence. It is through our private agency if she and the state would be willing to accept it. She said to fax it in and she will start to see what she can do. The hard part is we are in a different state and are not blood related so it is going to be hard to get this done. I am still not sure if we need a lawyer. She kinda dropped that after I told her about the home study and so on. We talked for about 45 min. I gave her our sob story (in a calm matter) and basically told her She could do what she wanted and I trusted they would do what was best for Braden but that I would always feel like a mother to him. I informed her I had his baby book of his pictures at birth and his ultrasound pictures. She did say at one point that she would have to come to Louisville once a month for him and I asked if she would be willing to do that and she said yes. I did not get the "this is a go" answer I just got the "send in your home study and foster care stuff and I will see what we can do." Yesterday night I started working on submitting all the foster care hours on the spread sheet. We need 24 hours of reading or classes or movies. Jamie and I went to 2 training sessions for 8 hours each but when looking at the class time it was like 3 hours of actual class and the rest was fluff. Ahh! I am so frustrated. I am feeling very, very overwhelmed. This is gonna take a lot of time and then here comes to emotions again. Can I handle it? If this is just another trial couldn't we have been spared? I know if it is meant to be a lot of doors will be open and hearts will be softened. Just a warning if anyone says to me "what is meant to be will be" I might just rip your head off :-) I already know that and reminding me of it will not help :-) I have been struggling with all of our trials. Every week something new not in our favor happens. PLEASE LET THIS BE A BLESSING AND NOT A TRIAL!!! I cannot cry over this anymore, it is not good for me and my family. Last night I finally lost it. Pretty good I think... I held it in for over a week. Please keep us in your prayers! We need it!